


Osgoods, too.

by Slant



Series: Osgoods [2]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F, Slice of Life, death in heaven
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-09
Updated: 2014-11-09
Packaged: 2018-02-24 18:17:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2591420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slant/pseuds/Slant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One of the Osgoods has a terrible day at work. The other Osgood comforts her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Osgoods, too.

The Osgood who had been to work today knocks on the door. The Osgood who had stayed home lets her in and kisses her affectionately.  
"How was your day dear?"  
"I got sodding _discorporated_ ," says the telepathic Osgood who can alter her brain completely without altering her personality in the slightest. "By the Doctor's _friend_ , One minute he's all 'oh you should consider seeing the entire universe nudgenudge winkwink' and then he leaves me down in the lab with some sort of murderous shape-shifting alien."  
The Osgood who had previously been abandoned in her lab with some sort of murderous shape-shifting alien leers at the Osgood who had been that murderous shape-shifting alien. "Were they hot? Did you kiss them?"  
"She was plenty evil crazy and no. I'm pretty sure it was the Master. She had me lean in so she could whisper threats in my ear- I was expecting her to do the hypnosis thing the files say she used to do- it would work on the Osgood simulation I was running in the meat-brain but not on my meta-persona, but she didn't. She just slipped her handcuffs into my pocket because that was a needless complication to her escape that would make her feel clever. Then she taunted me for a bit and zapped me into atoms. Which is how I lost my door key."  
"Huh. Not the best start to a relationship."  
"I know right? Then she stomped my glasses. That's just mean."  
"She killed Scary and Alan. Like it was nothing. Like they didn't matter. She killed me to annoy the Doctor; that was I was worth to her. I saw the plane go down too. Lethbridge-Stewart and Ahmed and I don't even know who the pilot or the petty officers were; they must have died."  
The Osgood who is suddenly crying on the floor hadn’t noticed herself collapsing. The other Osgood is kneeling and holding her, carefully hugging her head in order to not to restrict her breathing.  
She cries blubbery and snotty and disgusting, and is soon gasping for breath. She could stop it, clear her sinuses, fix her lungs or adjust the persona so its emotions weren’t a mess, but then she'd be less like the wonderful, awkward, courageous, obsessively inquisitive and occasionally depraved woman holding her. She'd sooner die.  
The other Osgood passes her an inhaler and a box of tissues.  
"Breath for me sweetie." They'd had arguments about her having asthma, but the Osgood with no choice about her biochemistry has no comeback to 'I want to see the world the way you do'.  
The Osgood who has had a spectacularly terrible day continues to sob and hiccup for a bit.  
"I'm glad she didn't realise that whatever she was doing wouldn't kill you."  
"Me too. 'm glad you let me persuade you to stay home today."  
"Awww." The Osgood who had stayed home pouts, "you just wanted to be the badass in the op outside St Paul's."  
"I", says the Osgood who was there, voice trembling only slightly, "was wicked cool. We should get the CCTV footage."  
The Osgoods have a lot of footage of themselves doing various things.  
"My hero." The Osgood who is not a sobbing wreak kisses the other Osgood on the temple.  
"Speaking of our heroes. I don't think that the Doctor is very committed to us not dieing."

**Author's Note:**

> This needs some wild speculation to keep both the Osgoods alive.  
> I figure that Zygons can only use their brains for thinking like whoever they are impersonating- thinking like the Zygon must happen somewhere incorporeal otherwise they'd be, on some level, physically different from whoever they are impersonating. (Hole in this theory- Zygons have died in previous episodes.) 
> 
> For purposes of this story, the discorporated Osgood(Zygon) re-embodied either some protoplasm that she'd left in a tank somewhere in a UNIT facility or skin flakes that she'd left around the plane lab, which drifted to the ground and then grew. 
> 
> Not exactly the solidest foundation for a story :).


End file.
